I love Elizabeth Gilbert. Aside from reading Eat, Pray, Love before taking off on my own Italian adventure in 2007 I connect with her inquisitive nature as a writer. We often look at ourselves for understanding of what is going on in the world and her self reflection has touched millions of women crossing ethnicity and culture lines.
While doing research on an article, I found this quote regarding the truth of the 50% divorce rate statistic. I immediately equated this to the 42% of black women not married. There is always another side to a statistic.
Q: Why do you think U.S. divorce rates are so high? What statistical findings did you encounter that people might consider before tying the knot?
A: First of all, it's important to know that the famous "50% divorce rate" that we hear about so much these days is a little bit misleading. Across the board, there is a 50% divorce rate, true, but those numbers really change based on the age of the couple at the time of marriage. Young couples divorce at astronomically high rates, which blows the curve for everyone else. The fundamental conclusion we can draw from all the data is this: Marriage is not a game for the young. Wait as long as you humanly can to get married, and your odds of staying with one partner forever will increase dramatically. If you wait until you are, say, 35 years old to get married, your odds of success are pretty terrific. The other question is one of expectation. Modern Americans bring to their marriages the most over-stuffled bundle of expectations the institution has ever seen. We expect that our partner will not merely be a decent person, but will also be our soul mate, our best friend, our intellectual companion, our greatest sexual partner and our life's complete inspiration. Nobody in human history has ever asked this much of a companion. It's a lot to ask of one mere mortal, and the inevitable disappointments that follow such giant expectations can cripple marriages.
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